Today I had one class that was good, and then I came home and wrote some important things in my journal that I want to put here too. I don’t think I’ve put up a very quality post recently because I’ve felt so burned out, but I’m feeling less of that introversion and exhaustion and I want to share some honesty.

  • Travel isn’t all wonder and glam. It’s hyped up a lot. There are a ton of unrealistic expectations when it comes to travel and it can make people envious or idealistic about it, but it’s also just life. It’s hard as hell sometimes. Sometimes it can suck or you can have a bad day or not like a place or not have any epiphanies or life-changing moments. Sometimes you’re just a girl who went away to Spain for a few months and is coming home with more memories and experiences. It’s cool, no doubt, and I love it. But it’s not for everyone, and that’s okay too. There can be a lot of beauty and reward and opportunity with it, but that’s because it can be as challenging as anything else. I just think it’s important not to idealize it because it’s really common for people to see someone going away on a trip and have tons of expectations or crazy thoughts about it, but I think it’s important to remember that it is still a facet of life with the whole multitude of complexity and feeling that comes along with every part of life.

I change my mind, that’s actually all I want to share from my journal today. The other things are notes for myself, like being more honest with myself and other people, forgiving and loving myself always, remembering to think of other people more, and letting myself feel my feelings entirely. I just think these things are important, and maybe mentioning them here will help remind someone else too.

I volunteered today which mostly consisted of talking to the teacher there. I like to think that she’s become an actual friend here, not just someone I work with. I’m very thankful for her and for that class. I helped them with some of their school work, and then they all helped me with some of mine. We got to walk home together today, which is also one of my favorite parts of any week because I love talking to her.

After that, I rested a lot. Then I had dinner with my roommate. Then, we halfway panicked. Dramatic story short, we thought there was a chance we might not make it to Ireland in the morning. There is still that chance, but it is much lower now because we talked to our host mom and this wonderful woman helped us out, and I called my dad who reminded me of something my grandma told me in the way of not letting certain things get in the way of the trips I want to take. All of that refreshed my spirits, including the ones that earlier this week almost felt too tired to be excited for this trip, and helped me decide that I want to make this happen no matter what. Hopefully everything will go smoothly tomorrow, but if it doesn’t, that’s just life and I’ll find a way to make it work. So, until tomorrow, in Ireland.

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